While the arguments above all have some basic merit, I
strenuously object to the way they are often used, not as a piece of general
advice but as an absolute decree: Thou Shalt Never Do This. Yes, faking orgasms
can lead to trouble, or be symptomatic of problems if you’re doing it on a
daily basis, but there’s a big difference between accepting these things and
acting as if those who fake orgasms are bad at sex, and must be either pitied
or corrected.
Realistically, people fake orgasms for a whole host of
reasons. Some good, some bad, some practical, some habitual. You know, like
many of the sex things we do. Sometimes I’m not up for a long make out session,
but my partner is and I know that if I do it chances are I’ll get his hand down
my knickers at some point – the jackpot I’m actually angling for. Sometimes
I’ll suck a dick not because I’m desperate to get it down my throat, but
because it just feels like the natural next step in a fuck I’m playing jazz
with. Often we do things because they make us wet and hard and throbbing and
horny - occasionally we do them for other reasons.
I’ve faked orgasms
Although the vast majority of it has been spectacular, there
have still been occasions where I felt like faking an orgasm was the right
thing to do. I’m lucky enough that I usually find it easy to come during a
shag, and right now I’m with a long-term partner who has a thick cock and a
good rhythm, and who knows me inside out, as it were. I also have a Doxy and my
own two hands, should things prove more difficult on a particular occasion, so
I haven’t faked one for a good long time. But have I faked orgasms in the past?
Goddamn right I have.
Not because I’m tired, or because the sex is appalling and I
can’t quite bring myself to say so: I’ve faked orgasms for the simple reason
that coming represents the nuclear button in my sexual arsenal – when I come,
he is more likely to come.
Six pints into a very late night, if we’re having an
exciting fumble followed by a sticky and determined hump, it’s probably going
to be tough for both of us. I’m deeply horny, and shivering with lust, but I
know that it’s just not going to happen. The one thing I want right now is to
feel the twitching throb of his cock pumping spunk inside me. I’m faced with a
choice. Do I pull out one of my just-about-adequate sex moves? A hand gripping
just the right place, an arched back, a filthy sentence or two to help him on
his way? Or do I pull out my ultimate sex move - clenching my cunt nice and
tight and moaning like I’ve sat on a washing machine?
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